Monday, August 16, 2010

Man, I Miss Me

Holy blog deprivation, you guys. Since being home from my little hiatus I haven't been able to find my mommy mojo and get back into the routine of making time to write while also doing the 456, 732 other things necessary for oiling this family machine. Nothing like a break in your typical program to kink up your momentum and make you feel like the substitute teacher without hand-outs and teacher's key. I have lesson plans (if matching shoes and going to the pool count as lesson plans) but no "insider's knowledge" of how to get through them smoothly.

I think the real irony here is that time away from home usually makes other people in your family appreciate all you do but this time it made me realize all I do. And now I have no idea what kind of super human freak I was before I left because seriously there isn't any "leftover" time in the day to write. There isn't any kind of pocket of unused minutes I can dip into for uploading pictures, organizing thoughts, and posting some coherent story about our day. Did I once do this at 2am? Did I give the children bags of gum drops and looped cartoons around noon so I could blog? Was there a slow CO leak I didn't know about? Whatever the case, I once was crafty enough to find the time. Now? Two weeks later I am putting Abby in her brother's T-shirts because suddenly her own clothes don't fit. I am forgetting to make eye contact with Grayson who has a running dialogue with my thighs lately as I whir a blue streak around the house with Windex. I am cleaning up doughnuts that Sadie heisted in our absence, not because she loves sour cream cake, (mind you, this dog has been known to turn her snout away from steak if it's too gristly), but because she's bored as hell (or is assuming that I am bored as hell too and want to play hide-and-doughnut-seek when I return). And don't even get me started on that guy I haven't seen in going on three weeks now but whose aftershave leaves me breathless because my nose tricks me for one millisecond into thinking he's only in the next room. Seriously you guys, what the hell is going on around here? Where is my children's mother? Where is that dogwalker, cook, maid, nanny, split decision maker, multi-tasking gangster? Where is that girl who could whip everyone into shape by 10 am and have enough brain power to post relevant images and daily meanderings?

She must still be shopping in NY.

I just hope she remembers milk and eggs.


Jessica said...

I'm with you. Big time. I've been sick since I got back and now I've lost my voice completely. Hollis has been a champ, but he's been talking to my thighs, too, the house is a dead zone and I can't seem to take proper care of myself.

What happened in NYC? For real.

Crystal D said...

Super love the new layout. And I agree, I am recharged yet still a mess. I am hoping that school will provide the structure and routine for me. Plus 7 hours with only one child in my house should help too.
Until then, I'll just feed them dry cereal and carrot sticks and invite multiple kids at a time over for play-dates, because somehow that actually makes it easier.

pajama mom said...

i'm no help,
i didn't even go anywhere,
and i feel the same way.

One Sided Momma said...

jess - you got double whammied when you got home, i'm so sorry. :( sick child plus being sick yourself. ugh and ohhhh. i hope you're both on the mend by now.

crystal - thank you re: new layout. i didn't like the orange text on dark gray & missed a white background. still not in love w/it so it will be changing until i can buy it dinner and let it see me naked. sorry, what? anyway, thanks. also? i SO wish i could benefit from playdates like a normal mom but i continue to despise them w/every fiber of my being. glad they give you a reprieve though b/c you need/deserve a break (or 10).

One Sided Momma said...

pj - you went to a function and that's the same thing as being away in my book. plus, i think we are all ready for september!