Wednesday, September 26, 2012
This IS the Easy Part
I recently read an article (blog post) about how married couples naturally pull away from each other (hideout in bathroom) and then come back together (wine/tequila) in a natural ebb and flow that would, if given the proper machinery, look like a woman having a contraction.
So, marriage would look a little like this: --------^^^^^^^--------^^^^^^^----------^^^^^^^---------^^^^^^^^^^^(*sick kids, up all night for weeks, ne touch pas)^^^^^^^^^^^^^^----------------^^^^^^^, etc.
Interesting. More issues once again, stemming from the mother. When do we hardworking girls catch a break?
I digress. After some thought I'd have to say I'm in a contraction marriage too.
Sometimes the contractions last much longer than a minute or two. Sometimes those puppies go on for months. Barking Bernese Mountain Dog puppies without an epidural. Oh mama, the pain is hard to bare.
Then, eventually the dust settles, the children get their Cephalexin, and the crushing fog lifts. Contraction over, you're chewing on ice chips and looking each other in the eyes again.
"I've missed you."
"I've missed you too."
"Where have we been?"
"Busy. We've been really effing busy."
"Let's snuggle tonight."
To expedite the snuggling, I attempt to throw the children into their beds like boomerangs two or three times until they're finally down for good.
"Do you think this is ever going to get easier?"
"Babe. This is the easy part."
"Sh*t. We'd better get some sleep."
"Goodnight. I love you.
"Can you scoot over a little please, I love you too."