(Shhh, don't tell Grayson his snowman has a bright red colostomy bag, it'll ruin the experience.)
Sledding and I go way back. My older brother (Eric), my mom, and I once lived in Minnesota for a few years (once upon a time) and 20 inches of snow was a mediocre day of precipitation there. Blizzards and white outs were the norm, so much so the school districts wouldn't cancel school because all the buses had chains on their tires. I can remember actually tunneling to our neighbors' houses in 5 layers of clothing with our Freezie Freaky gloves (remember those?) like little mole people and hanging out in our "igloos" until our parents yelled outside for us to come back in. It was not uncommon to open our front door and see more snow than sky right away. We had to walk miles and miles to our bus stop in our bare feet and....okay, okay, you get it.
For me to share the sledding experience with my two little kids is more fun than I can explain in words. I had a ball outside with them showing them all the tricks of the sledding trade:
- walk to the left of the trail so as to keep the trail smooth and glacial
- Hold On - Always!
- feet up and lean back on sled to go faster
- it's more fun to go down in pairs on your sled
- it's less fun to have Sadie to make that pair on your sled
- jump ship if you're heading toward a tree (or an upright metal pole from the tetherball game your lazy parents forgot to remove for the winter)
Pretty good run, Little Grasshopper.
Next up, Abigail. Oh don't give me that look, it was totally her idea. She was all, "Put me in coach!" with Evel Kinevel in her veins, this child, and would throw a bigger hissy if I didn't let her go down the hill all by herself, trust me.
"C'mon already, Woman, I'm ready to get this party started!"
"Whoa, Nelly. Hold on, Hold ON, HOLD ON!"
says stupified mom who is pretty sure she's headed to the ER after this snow stunt.
Sadie looks on, unimpressed. She's waiting for the triple lutz, I suppose.
And score. Still on tobaggen. All limbs intact. No facial abrasions or lacerations.
Still smiling. Ready for round two.
"I said READY FOR ROUND TWO WOMAN, Did I stutter?"
And then she cried because I did not push her up the hill fast enough for a second go. True Story.
Who says the kids get to have all the fun?
What? There was an angry, rabid, vampire wolf ready to eat me whole at the end of my run, swear to God.
See? Grrrr. An albino rabid vampire wolf - even worse. I barely escaped with my life. Or my pink tennis ball.